• Jasmine Mendiola

"I don’t have a daddy"

sbi ni mio kanina while staring up at his tito mike carrying his cousin meg.

they were stunned. my family. to hear this while i was away because i am most naturally at work.

to which they answer, “why do you say that, mio?”

“maybe because i still have plenty of toys.”

It doesn’t make sense but you think my smart ass son has a concept that he cannot have everything so because he is showered with an abundance of gifs and other loving people, he doesn’t have a daddy yet? only mio knows.

i knew this day would come when he’d ask this simple question that entails such a difficult answer. just when i thought his “who’s my daddy? is tito joao my daddy?” question the other night enough for his memorable quiries this year. there’s more to come. i didn’t expect it this early.

so…

you know who you are. you said so yourself, deep in your heart of hearts. like i said in the past, i do not need you nor do i want you back in my life. and i, as always, will stand by my word.

but the current state right now is that i am working for two people and compromising the attention i give my son; i am compromising myself; i am emotionally challenged and i am humbled everyday that my son shows great signs of wisdom.

so i apologize for my arrogance and selfishness. i was, to begin with underestimating you eversince we were young. i know you are an innately good person.

so drop by even we don’t see eye to eye. because i told mio that he has a dad. he just hasn’t met him and that he is a good old friend of mom.

for mio. not for me. its time to grow up, mao. mauunahan ka na ng anak mo, baka mas maging mature pa sya syo.

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Jasmine Mendiola

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